Monday, June 5, 2006: Dia de San Bonifacio, St. Boniface's Day, at least in the Catholic Diocese of El Paso

[Last update & edit job, Wednesday p.m., 6/07/2006]

The hardworking and dynamic young Jesuit priest from down South Oregon Street who came to say the 7:00 Mass Monday morning told us all he could about Saint Boniface, but!

Being a good and prudent priest in the mold of Pope John Paul II and Saint Ignatius Loyola, he left out the more sensational stuff.

So, anyhow, here we go:

"Controversy continues to rage among America's top academics over supposed scientifc proofs offered in support of a revolutionary new thesis, linking the Mens ACTS Retreat movement, at least that segment most concerned with the March, 2006 ACTS Mens' Retreat in Las Cruces, New Mexico, to ancient legends about an early prototype of ACTS associated with Archbishop Saint Boniface's arrival in what is now Southern Germany." Dr. Snizzlestein, Phd. Rodney, et al. Editors. The American Journal of Contemporary Polemical Anthropology. May, 2006.

As the good Dr. Snizzlestein assures us:

"It was an alert anonymous reader of the UT El Paso Library book by the British author Henry Mayr-Harting, The Coming of Christianity to Anglo-Saxon England, who started it all."

"She quickly won a 3-year $50,000 dollar per year Brenda Lynn Castaneda Grant, Restricted Funds Contracts & Grants # 26-Appt-0309 2002-2003 (less UTEP's 15% mandatory administrative kickback. Oops! excuse me! It was actually a "Voluntary Contribution to the Hector Villa III Foundation for Minority Rights," a Ms. Cynthia M. Villa, Honorary Chairperson) for proposing to study this issue. Upon assuring the University of Texas System Board of Regents in Austin that she could indeed both read and write, the student won against all of her competitors, hands down.

"As she quotes from Mayr-Harting's work, page 270:

When Boniface wrote to fellow bishops, he was fond of reminding them that episcopal authority meant service, a very Gregorian theme, and the service of the pastor had been exemplified by Christ's washing of his disciple's feet and his command that they do likewise to others.

His reminder therefore took the form of sending them towels for this purpose.

Boniface never seemed short of this commodity, and whatever presents he might receive -- cloaks or spices or books -- back would go, as likely as not, the inevitable towel."

So, there we have it, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls: and that's the way the authentic legend of St. Bonifacio's link to the Mens' ACTS Retreat movement was born...