Monday, July 31, 2006

NMSU'S Real life Mystery!

Part III:

Lt. Col. David Abbott and the Miracle of the Mysteriously Peeing Admiral's Statue

Today's Episode:

NMSU'S Chief of Police at least goes through the motions!

Date: [Roughly] Fri. 30 Sep 2005
To: Dr. Pat Williams, NMSU Regents Chief of Staff,
From: NMSU Police Chief Jaime Chavez
Re: Allegations of Harassment and Assault Against NMSU students at UTEP/NMSU Game.

"Dr. Williams, I have researched the files and talked to personnel assigned to the game on that date. I have also read the article in the UTEP paper; we did not have any incident of that type reported to the NMSU Police or [to] anyone else that we know of.

Chief Jaime Chavez"

Wow! What a relief! ¡Aquí, no pasó nada! But perhaps that was before disaster struck, and Lt. Col. David Abbott, United States Army, lumbered into the picture...

Friday, July 28, 2006

[Updated Monday a.m. 7/31/2007]

Now, the routing at the bottom of this letter indicates a "degree of concern" regarding a supposedly routine case involving the UTEP Dean of Student's Office that appears way out of line for the otherwise routine accusation of a UTEP student of predatory criminal sexual misconduct, however defined, a Class C Misdemeanor, inasmuch as the investigating officer who explained all this to me came within an ace of reading me my rights down at the UTEP Police Station, as well as offering me access to legal counsel on Monday am, July 21, 2003, albeit acting on tampered or contrived evidence.

This all struck me at the time as being much like a typical oldtime East Coast shake-down routine involving money-hungry big city police vice and narcotics officers acting as vigilant "daddies" for high-class hookers working as part of what we called in those far-off days as a protected operation.

When asked, however, and I think it's only fair to UTEP's Police Department to point this out, the officer denied being Viviana Marisela Cardona's "daddy" biologically or otherwise, but did grudgingly admit that that was her real name, so that "Yes, Mr. Morony, we are talking about the same person here."

While, perhaps unententionally, perhaps not, he made allusions to "problems of this kind" with additional material that may well have been a veiled, matter-of-fact reference to two main lines of both on-campus and off-campus UTEP hookers, he left out, for whatever reason, my someday new wannabe buddy, "Frank," as well as Dr. Richard Ford's longtime business associate, Mr. Estevan Gonzalez, and Ford, himself. Ford had stuck his big size 12 shoe into this business from ground zero, if a spirited exchange recorded live August 15, 2003, between Ms. Lisa D. Campos-Emmert and Ms. Viviana Marisela Cardona can be taken at face value.

Frank, in all fairness to him is just your typical, UTEP-created, run of the mill, so-called male ho. Forget safe sex. This clown's brains have long passed the point of no return. Specifically, when he came on to me sexually on the Number 10 trolley in November, 2004, much as the St. Patrick's ACTS Retreat male-ho-in-residence Carlos "Charles" [last name deleted for make-believe girlfriend's sake. 7/31/2006] would during Saturday Mens and Womens ACTS Retreat Monthly Mass at the Cathedral.

Later, "Frank" claimed to have been a 24-year-old Spring of 2004 UTEP Graduate in Psychology.

Thanks to UTEP's Dr. Josie Tinajero's Educational Department of Alternative Certification, "Frank" was even more. Can't you all just see it?

He's God's gift both to UTEP Alternative Certification's Special Ed, and to the El Paso ISD substitute teacher department, as well as, of course! God's gift to the UTEP male student populaton as a whole, or that part of it, like "Frank" himself, already brain-fried on amyl nitrate, in Frank's case most likely since he was working as a teeny-bopper hooker for some big city chicken trade.

"Frank" kept staring at me from maybe less than a foot away, turned back in his Number 10 trolley seat. "But how did you know," he kept saying over and over again. Over the past few months, "Frank" has popped up up now and again around the outside of St. Patrick's Cathedral, I'm not sure why, maybe he's on the way to getting religion. Fine by me if he is. Hell, I need to, myself. And that' s no jive!

Then, again, mayby there's more to this Mens ACTS Retreat business than meets the eye.

My guess would be that he was pretty cagey about this Dr. Ford--Mr. Estevan Gonzalez Business Partnership, for all the Corpus Christie Caller named one Estevan Gonzalez as being involved in a racket called Underground Entertainment, Ltd. (or whatever). Although "Frank" does seem to live in their area of town. He often times heads that way on the #14 Chapparral Bus.

However, unlike St. Patrick's Cathedral's Mens ACTS Retreat's "Carlos," "Frank" is shrewed enough as a commercially minded UTEP male ho to know when to back off, and stay backed off. While "Charles" is physically a clinger, literally hitting on anybody, from 18 to 58. This has created concern in at least one U.S. government MD Psychiatrist, who expressed his opinon that "Charles" acts like somebody who is more than merely militant and gay, rather this Men's ACTS Retreat male ho-in-residence is suffering from what the doctor calls early onset dementia.

But! Let's get back to the basics:

So far as that so-called "UTEP Chief of Police," Mr. William "Willie" Adcox was concerned, it took exactly one(1) phone to him by the legendary Mister J.J. Armes to cool that wannabe caveman's as* down, and in a heartbeat.

You can da*mn well believe it!

Anyway, the letter head even has the official:


Then, we read, printed across the page right below the seal:


Francie A. Frederick, Counsel and Secretary to the Board
201 West Seventh Street, Suite 820
Austin, Texas 78701-2981
(512) 499-4402
Fax: (512) 499-4425

October 23, 2003

Mr. Dennis Paul Morony
Number such and such a street,
El Paso, Texas 79902

Dear Mr. Morony:

The Office of the Board of Regents for The University of Texas System received your complaint regarding a desciplinary matter at The University of Texas at El Paso.

It is our understanding from Mr. Richard Adauto, Vice President for Institutional Advancement at U.T. El Paso, that the Hearing Officer has now issued a ruling in the matter.

Please know that in accordance with the Handbook of Operating Procedures for U.T. El Paso and the Rules and Regulations of the Board of Regents of the U.T. System, you may appeal the decision of the hearing Officer to President Natalicio. The decision of the President is the final appellate review in student discipline matters.

Should you have any questions regarding youur rights, you may contact Vice President Adauto at Mail Code 00500, El Paso, Texas 79968, (915) 747-5555 or .

Sincerely yours,


Francie A. Fredercik
Counsel and Secretary


c: Chairman Charles Miller
c: Members, U.T. Board of Regents
c: Chancellor Mark Yudof
c: Executive Vice Chancellor Teresa A. Sullivan
c: President Diana S. Natalicio
c:Vice President Richard Adauto







OH, MY! OH, MY! (HEH, HEH!)"


Date: 10/01/2003
From: Dennis Paul Morony
To: Mr. Charles Miller
Via: UPS Next Day Air
No.: 17748073
Charges: $19.24
Contents: Letter + Documents + 1 Condum

Thursday, July 27, 2006

[August] 13, 2003.

"Memo To: Chief of Police WILLIAM ADCOX, via UTEP police administrative clerk, Ms. ARACELI FERNANDEZ.

From: UTEP Senior Dennis Paul Morony.

Dear Chief Adcox:

Regarding the copy of the so-called "maybe memo" enclosed, over [UTEP] Associate Dean Ms. Lisa D. Campos Emmert's signature, on page two where we are told Ms. [Viviana Marisela] CARDONA and/or Detective FONSECA "may" [as in also "may not"] show up for the scheduled public and recorded hearing presenly set for 9:00 am Friday morning, August 15th., here are the questions that would be asked, in writing, through UTEP's designated hearing officer:"

Etc. etc. etc...



Mr. Morony: "During the time frame from monday, July 21, at 11:30 am -- to 5 p.m. Wednesday, July 23, 2003, did you personally or did another member of the UTEP police department meet - at the UTEP police station -- with Ms. VIVIANA MARISELA CARDONA? A simple yes or no is all we [are] asking for: this is not a fishing expedition!"

Detective Fonseca: "Yes."

Mr.Morony: "During the time frame from Monday, August 11th at 8:00 AM thorugh Thursday, August 14th at 5 PM, did you personally or did another member of the UTEP police department meet -- at the police station -- with Ms. VIVIANA MARISELA CARDONA? A simple yes or no is all we're asking for, etc."

Detective Fonseca: "No." [There are some quiet signals at this point, indicating that this very morning, Friday, August 15, 2003, he had indeed been a witness to something involving Ms. Campos --Emmerts, and Ms. Cardona, but I didn't want to go into it at that moment, with both Ms. Campos Emmert and Dr. Munter present. Plus this wasn't a "real deal" court situation. As we had both chuckled earlier, if it had been, then both prosecution and defense attorneys would have been going off in all directions with the old "Objection, your honor!" routine.]

Mr. Morony: [After he cracks a joke to alert the detective that this one is going to be one long doozy!] "During the time frame from appiroximately 3:30 pm Tuesday, July 22, 2003, through 3:30 pm Wednesday, July 23, 2003, we know for certain that two(2) phone calls were initiated in our presence by the chief of detectives of a private firm over on Montana street [The legendary J.J. Armes aka The World's Greatest Detective, who UTEP's own Dr. Diana was so mistaken as to personally attempt to shake down years earlier, using his two adult children as hostages to fortune, her own + UTEP's, that same legendary Mister J.J. Armes, alive and in person! Added 7/27/2006. Dennis]: one for UTEP Chief of Police Mr. WILLIAM ADCOX, and the other to Police Detective A. FONSECA. We are not aware of a third one, at least a third one was not made to anyone at UTEP in our presence. Both of the other two calls were eventually returned within this same time frame.

"But we have some pretty firm evidence that a third party either made a call upon her own initiative to the Montana street location within this same time frame from her work location at UTEP,or returned a phone call she had received at her UTEP work location during this same time frame.

"She was more or less described to us in a telephone ocnversaiton beginning at around 3:15 pm Wednesday, July 23, as a female employee of some student office there at UTEP.

"Thus our question here is: would you happen to know if this person was the [UTEP] Assistant Dean of Students, Ms. Lisa D. Campos-Emmert? Because if the answer is yes, it was, then this in turn may well open up yet another line of inquiry in the years to come, as this case ambles its way along."

Detective Fonseca: [Brief pause] "No." [Another, longer pause] "I don't know."

Mr. Morony: "Thank you!"

[Bingo! We had our answer!]

UTEP, Fall Semester of 2003!

"From being Assistant Dean of Students, to being the latest acquisition in UTEP's Turkey Farm* in just 6 weeks:

"The flip side of the The Miner's [Try PROSPECTOR'S, fool! 7/27/2006 dpm] Enron Corporation-style puff-piece for Oct. 1 [2003] UTEP welcomes new associate athetic director. But! She's still going to be and she's still going to act -- as herself, and just as she did weeks ago as Lisa D. Campos-Emmert.

"When today's Lisa Campos was still:

A.) Assisting in the filing of a false UTEP Police Dept. report, NO. 030661; in spite of her own initial misgivings.

B.) And getting caught flat footed ater trying to deny it.

C.) Conspiring to assist in tampering with the resulting rap sheet -- and getting caught yet again.

D.) Then panicking and in the process literally trashing her star witness in a variety of ways, like leaving her name on the rap sheet, but not mine, [a real, down-home ho-class thing to do, and to another UTEP woman! "Ho-class thing to do," because of what follows! 7/27/2006 Dennis], while heroically maitaining her estimable in-your-face style of comporment, while admitting later on -- along with Dr. Judith Munter -- that UTEP's star witness had indeed been coached (or outright threatened) into lying, but so what? And who cares? That all this, too, is recorded!

E.) Trying to bluff her way with a respected member of El Paso's police-intelligence community, outside UTEP. [He wasn't buying it! 7/25/2006 Dennis]

F.) Alienating at least one senior UTEP Police CID detective, and so putting him into a passive aggressive mode in which he willingly, and cheerfully, allowed the two of them to lead one another down a wel-known primrose path, again recorded live for official prosperity, on Friday, August 15, 2003 -- between 9:00 to 9:45 am.

*Presumably as a reward for for recklesly embroiling the waning yars of [UTEP's] Dr. Diana Natalicio's already beleaguered administration in a series of quietly germinating public relations disasters ... Turkey Farms are slots reserved for disgraced executives, still classified as hot -- or of knowing too much -- to be canned outright."

Dr. Julie M. Wong-as-a-Budding Real Estate Mogul Update, 7/27/2006:

Apparently figuring she had asked for it, inasmuch as she had, the guys downtown have soaked her but good for 2006, although she put up a hell of a fight, so who knows?

Maybe she was helped by UTEP lawyers acting as fronts for her powerful UTEP patrones, aka Los Sin Caras, "The Faceless Ones, " aka "The Enforcers." After all, if they have the power to have one of Doc Sadler's UTEP varsity basketball players get his jaw literally smashed to pieces by some reject from what our former fellow inmate "Fred" -- an ASU Department of Journalism graduate -- eloquently called in our own little inmate newspaper The Valley of the Down-low Hos, thereby sending Doc the message You'd better quit f....'n us around on these game-throwing multi-state gambling contracts, you hear,? "helping" Dr. Julie wouldn't have been any big deal. Cool? You bet, home, like 'way, 'way cool.

After all, whether breaking some UTEP varsity player's jaw "accidently" or some other UTEP student's leg on purpose, in the later case maybe to send all of us at UTEP a message, they know that Dr. Diana's UTEP Dean of Students Dr. Julie M. Wong will back them to the hilt.

But! "Oh, beautiful UTEP People!"

She's still stuck with a $216,802 Appraisal, even with the limosna of $5,000 given her by the County of El Paso, and $15,000 given her by the El Paso ISD, apparently both under the routine so-called Exemption Code: HMSTD shineola.

By the way, all you brothers out there who know your black prison slang just have to know what "Fred" was telling us, right? So, like who put the you know what on UTEP Coach Sadler to recruit such a person for one of his UTEP Varsity Basketball Players in the first place? Even Don Haskins tells us in is book how much all coaches like to gamble, and assuming Moe Iba's honorary step daddy is telling us the truth, and I for one, say he is, it just looks like Doc has long since past the point of no-return. To sacrifice the physical well-being of one of his own UTEP varsity players, because of a Sin Cara multi-state mob game-throwing gambling contract gone all hay wire, that really su*ks. Big time!

Moran, Christy D.

From: Wong, Julie
Sent: Tuesday, January 25, 2005 9:44 AM
To: Moran, Christy D.
Subject: FW "Did last night's duty-officer-Technician leve[sic] the material in your box?"


Julie M. Wong, Ph.D.
Associate Vice President and Dean of Students
University of Texas at El Paso
102 Union West
El Paso, TX 79968
Office (915) 747-5648
FAX (915) 747-6471

From: Morony, Dennis P.
Sent: Tuesday, January 25, 2005 9:21 AM
To: Fonseca, Armando
C Cc: Wong, Julie M.;;;newsroom@;;
Subject: "Did last ight's duty-officer-technician leve[sic] the material in your box?"

Good morning, Detective Fonseca!

Did the lady tech on duty last night leave you the brown envelope we left with her at around 7:oopm or so?

It's around 9:20 right now, so I'm leaving the Library 3rd Floor Computer Center and then I'm ambling on over to the Deanof Studnet's Office to if maybe they've another "change of grade Petition" packet they can let me have.

After that, I'll most likely return home, off campus, but I will be back on campus, in Hudspeth Hall, classroom number 213, by no later than 20 to 12:00 noon.

From 3:00 PM to $:30 PM I'll be next door in the second floor of Worrell Hall, Dr. Springer's Philosophy 3314 class.

Let me know if you need to talk me, things are starting to really move, or so it seems, inasmuch as the University of Texas Board of Regents' inhouse attorney seems to have completely lost it, or at least tht her "clients" the Board of regents themselves, appear to have lost complete and total control of the UTEP situation, which may well dwarf even the recent Gasonov case.


Dennis Paul Morony
Senior UTEP Student


[Apparently I'd attached the following to my email above, so Dr. Julie M. Wong, having bitten down hard on the bait, was careful to make a hard copy of it, herself, or Dr. Christy Moran did, who knows? Either one or both ding-a-lings sent all of this to me by registered mail, making it hard for them to deny later on! Suckers!! ]

From: Dennis Paul Morony Jan 15, 2005

Financial Monekyshines at the University of Texas at El Paso's College of Education:

Is it really cool to put a 10-million dollar budget in the hands of some age-challenged "Queen of the online Hos?"

Speaking as only one student adrift in a sea of 18,000 plus fellow students, yours truly begs to differ!

[Blah, blah, yawn, stretch and belch some more, etc....!] Dennis

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Lt. Col. David Abbott, USA, and NMSU's Real Life Peeing Statue Mystery!

Source One, of a number: Robinson, Patrick. Kilo Class. New York: Harper Paperbacks, 1999.

Page 88:

"There was something about a large bronze statue of a departed admiral, which had been, mysteriously, filled with water by an unknown expert with a small drill; the statue peed for three days from a tiny hole in the front of its dress trousers."

Source Two A: Lt. Col. David Abbot to Dennis Paul Morony. Mon, 26 Sep 2005 16:20:45-0600.

Mr. Morony,

I have talked to the cadets in question, and apparently a minor inicdent did occur with a few inebriated UTEP fans. My cadets did not think the inident was noteworthy enough to mention or to file a formal complaint. Unfortunately, there always sems to be those inconsiderate few that mar great rivalries with inapprpriate behavior. Rest asssured that neither my cadets nor I consider the incident indicative of the fans or students of UTEP."


David L. Abbott, Lieutenant Colonel, US Army.

The above was in response to Dennis Paul Morony's long, rambling and inflammatory letter to Lt. Col. David Abbott, Thursday, September 22, 2005, 7:21 PM.

To: LTC David L. Abbott

Re: Reported shoving and spitting upon NMSU ROTC cadets, plus one(1) or more female NMSU photographers [Note: no specific mention by me here of female ROTC photographer, o.k.? O.K.! Added 7/25/2006], purportedly by some of [UTEP] Coach Mike Price's newly acquired Palace Guard of Miscellaneus Drunken Mike Foxtrots, (MDMFs, for short) or whatever he [UTEP's Coach Price] calls them.

Dear Colonel:

As a former enlisted Marine Combined Action Platoon Leader, one of around 114 senior Corporal E-4s and junior to senior Sergeant E-5s personally recruited in 1969 by the legendary Col. Edgar Danowitz, who in turn told us not long ago that HE had been a platoon leader in WW II, a company commander in Korea, a battalion commander in the Santo Domingo intervention, etc. I WOULD appreciate knowing just WHAT (if anything!) went on at he recent NMSU-UTEP Game over there in 'Cruces.

You see, the UTEP student newspaper printed what sounded like a blow-by-blow eyewitness account in the edition or Wednesday, September 14, 2005.

Yesterdy's edition (it only comes out once a week these days, on Wednesdays), September 21, 2005 made no mention of the incident at all, much less any attempt at rebuttal by our own UTEP administrators.

As a sometime UTEP student myself [Like, after December 31, 2099, heh, heh, HEH! Added with malicious glee by me, 7/25/2006! dpm], and still by and larg a loyal miners' fan, I find the whole business kinda unreal, like one of those shake and bake Hollywood movies of the late 1960s, something along the lines of Sam Peckinah's "Riot on Sunset Strip."

But, hell, I'd have thought by now, al that "stuff" was ancient history.

So, unless Ms. Francie Fenwick, Attorney and Board Member and Legal Counsel for the University of Texas System Board of Regents, in Austin, Texas, has already agre[sic.] to give you all a couple of cool million [As apparently happened this Spring, in another botched Dean of Students Dr. Julie S. Wong - UTEP case! Added 7/25/2006 dpm] to "help" finance an extra FTX or two, I'd appreciate learning from you as the senior OIC, just what the "flip" IS going on here!

Thanks, Colonel!

And "Semper Fi!"


Dennis Paul Morony

[ Former Sergeant E-5, MOS 0351, o311, 0331, 33 1/2 months combat duty in I Corps, RVN, between 11/66 and 11/69 ]

Note: as this case continued to unfold, sadly enough, one thing was quick to emerge. Lt. Col. David Abbott forgot a basic axion: "Yes, sir, No, mam, No excuse, sir or mam!" and instead decided to compromise his professional integrity as a commissioned officer by taking another road, one from which there could be no turning back.... hey, who knows? Maybe like Curtis Mayfield's classic line about a brother with a weakness of soul, or however it goes, only time would tell!

In the matter of the UTEP Disciplinary Charges against Dennis Paul Morony [Dr. Julie M. Wong's own little section is already updated and clarified!]

Plus, an add on bonus at the far end of:

The World of Dr. Julie Wong, UTEP Dean of Students, and the 32% + finder's fee of $25,236 She SEEMS to Have Shelled out for the Job!

Now, back to the UTEP Disciplinary Charges!

March 7, 2005

From: Dr. Cheryl Howard, Hearing Officer, Department of Sociology and Anthropology. [Two pages roughly, single space.]

To: UTEP Dean of Students.

[Blah, blah, blah, yawn and stretch, then] "Mr. Morony believes that a person he located on a dating website is in fact Dr. Munter. Moreover, whether Dr. Munter is or is not the person on a dating website is simply none of Mr. Morony's business and has nothing whatsover to do with her employment [Damn, lady! Which employment?! As Dean of the UTEP College of Education's R & D Budget of 10 million, or as an aging wannabe "Queen of the Online ____?"] The University simply cannot tolerate behavior that is harmful to its employees. I have no doubt that Mr. Morony believes that unethical practices are taking place. Mr. Morony is near graduation and has a high grade point average. Mr. Morony does not have to say he is sorry; [Damn! This lady has an intellect as sharp as a razor, albeit in this case, at least, in vain! dpm] he simply needs to say he was wrong..."

Entered on the sixth day of March, 2005


Dr. Cheryl Howard, Hearing Officer
(915) 747-5740 FAX (915) 747-5505

Note One:

Both UTEP's Dr. Howard and UTEP's Dr.Moran wanted to know about this detective you talked to, what was that all about? Me, I just kept quiet, as I knew they were more than likely expected to fish for info, big time! Everything was being taped live, just like it was in August of 2003.

Note Two:

It wasn't until later that I realized why Dr. Julie M. Wong was so concerned, as it was I had deliberately leaked to her UTEP email address, a copy of my email to a Senior CID Detective, either confirming a pending meeting beween us, or setting one up. Whatever. Because in-whatever-case, she bit, big time! Such is the World of Julie Wong, huh? Our current UTEP Dean of Students?

She looks like she is heavily involved in that old "Value Improved Sale - Conventional Loan" real estate baloney that got Duke Cunningham into so much trouble.

The Feds (or whoever) nailed Duke's posterior for having sold his house in Del Mar, California, for a cool $1,675,000. The problem? The clown paying the bribe couldn't do Jack Doodle with his new prized possession until he dropped his own sale price down to $975,000.

Dr. Wong's pay-out for her current $82,480 a year UTEP job, Acct# 14-0215-008, seems to have been $25,236 laundered through a happy couple named Richard P. and Paula Spencer, on or about October 21, 2004.

The actual total appraised value is currently (6/8/2006) $197,264.

World of Julie Wong price: $225,500.

Naturally, "somebody" smelled a rat downtown and in the appropriate box next to the one on page 2 of 3 that says: "Infomation Source, " we can read: "PSTD M L S - VERIFIED."

Thus, Dr. Julie Wong's Randy Duke Cunningham-style "over-payment" is roughy around 32% of her yearly salary.

Not bad, for a UTEP "job finder's fee," huh?

Because I've read that computerized printout, and guess what?

There simply ain't no such real estate improvements since that piece of property was put on the market brand new by Sherlock Homes Construction Company, period!

Hell, I couldn't even get Ed Santamaria to talk about The World of Julie Wong, Ed's crazy, but like a fox. Not even over a bunk house supper south of Las Cruces would he talk about it. Hell, my own bankers think she's nuts, as do all the others of that exclusive fraternity I've tried to constructively engage in conversation on it, whether male or female.

Yessirree, sir!

The World of UTEP's Dr.Julie Wong, UTEP Dean of Students!

"See y'all in -- yawn, stretch -- UTEP's Make Believe People's Court!"


April 26, 2005

Office of the UTEP Dean of Students

Dear Mr. Morony:

This letter serves to remind you that one of the sanctions assigned to you from the results of a University hearing has not been completed. It was stated that you were to write an apology letter (per enclosed attachment). As a result of this non-compliance a disciplinary hold has been placed on you record. [Until 12/31/2099, after that I walk, huh?! Heh, heh, HEH!]

Please contact me by May 3, 2005. Non-compliance can result in future disciplinary action. [¡Guau! Wow!] Please contact our office if you have any questions regarding this letter at 747-5648.



Christy D. Moran, Ph. D.
Assistant Dean of Students



cc: Dean of Students Disciplinary File

Friday, January 14, 2005
From: Morony, Dennis P.
Subject: Consistent patterns pointing to possible massive fraud [using] public funds at the University of Texas El Paso.

Hello, Mr. Bedell:

Say, get a load of this: during the five-month period beween March 07, 2002 and up to and including July 30, 2002 four University [of Texas] at El Paso Faculty members, three from the college of Education and one from Languages and [L]inguistics, moved some money into real estate deals. Now, this JUST may have been coincidental, but we doubt it.

Specifically: UTEP faculty members Doctors Richard R. Ford, Mourat A. Tchoshanov, Josefina V. Tinajero, and doctoral candidate (in education) Lisa D. Campos Emmert, as we've told Liberal Arts Associate Dean Myron H. Nadel, "managed to blow through $827,279 worth of real estate deals." We added: "[I]t is also true that [by the fact that] United States Attorney Johnny Sutton and the legendary FBI Agent Leslie Nelson were busy elsewhere,thanks tol one Sardar Eldarovich Gasanov and the latter's sucessful duping of UTEP's then star attractions ... Doctors Eppie Rael and Siddartha Das, [these four were subject to no outside scrutiny].

Mr. Bedell, an unfortunate side effect of all this is that, again, as we told Dean Nadel, [is that] "little or no such free and easy use of the public's money has ever managed to trickle down to those hardworking TAs in the [UTEP] Music Department, and you know something Dean Nadel? That's a doggone shame!"

And it IS! For the past two weeks or so, the water was cut off to the entire [UTEP] Music Department Building, and the staff -- in spite of the cold weather -- was relegated to the use of two(2) portable potties.

Now, back to UTEP's Gang of Four + 1, three of whom + 1 now have immediate access to a $10 million-dollar research slush fund, courtesy of the Federal and State Governments. [El Paso TIMES, Fall of 2003].

El Paso County Appraisal District public online records reveal the follow[i]ng:

#1: Ford, Richard R. [Linguistics] $193,088 March 03, 2002.
#2: Tchoshanov, Mourat A, etc. $65,286 March 27, 2002 [Turkmeni, "imported" from that area as Gasanov was from next door neighbor, Uzbekistan. Made this purchase after completing less than four(4) semesters of teaching + "research" at College of Education, UTEP]
#3 Tinajero, Roberto José and JOSEPHINA V. $398,277 June 24, 2002.
Samo-samo-samo, following year: $64,406 June 27, 2003.
#4 EMMERT, LISA D. and Sonny P.: $106,222 July 30, 2002.

Mr. Bedell, a real potentially problematical situation NOW arises regarding one DR. JUDITH HOPE MUNTER, "Associate Dean for Research, [UTEP]College of Education."


She has a lot to say about how and how fast that $10 million can be blown off.

So what?

[Because a] leisurely investigation over the past six or seven months has brought to light some unsettling demographic oddities.

There appears to be someone with an uncanny resemblance down to apparently having the same first, middle and last names, address and zip code here in El Paso, whose occupation appears compatible with that of an all-American so-called "Queen of the Online Hos," whose preferred good buddies need not concern themselves too much as top their own marital status, as she has already marked the appropriate spot next to that entry with the word "Any."

Feel free to check out her radiant beauty at: Yahoo! Personals, Profile ID: personals - 1081318347-416999.

Get a load of this:

[UTEP College of Education] Dean reportedly has a birthdate [falling] between the 1st. and 22nd. day of September, 1956. Claims she's "48."

[Meanwhile the] ho says she's "49." But! Her zodiac sign is [still] Virgo -- between August 22 and September 22.

Dean says she's a University of El Paso School of Education licensed professional in "Education," perhaps like her unfortunate Uzbeki predescessors, whose credentials [in Biological Science, I suppose as UTEP Adjunct Faculty. Added today, 7/25/2006] were also "impeccable," as the Gasanov case makes so clear.

The ho, by contrast, claims she's in the "Medical/Health Services Ocupation," raking in "$50,000 to $74,499" per year. "Tax free?" Hmmm.. GOOD question, Mr. Bedell!

Addendum Re. Dr. JOESPHINA TINAJERO: "We" got some unsolicited computer-generted [snail] mail from a six digit mail box in Bloomington, Indiana, telling "us" that Thanks to the warm recommendations of Dr. Tinajero -- yours truly couold get an immaculate set of genuinely phoney educational credentials. They even take credit cards. My goodness!

Well, hope you all might find something here worth pursuing, if not, better luck next time.

Yours truly,

[ Illegible scrawl! ]

Dennis Paul Morony, UTEP Senior, English and American Literature

[Sent "snail mail" same day, as webmail was yuck! Dennis]

My xerox copy has this scribbled on the top of the 2nd. page: "BLUE/GREEN SATURN TX S14-RDZ?"

Oh, my goodness!


Janaury 27, 2005:

UTEP Police Dept. CID Case Incident Report Number 030661 rocks smack into it's second year!

[Emphasis and colors added here and there]

Office of the UTEP Dean of Students
102 West Union
El Paso, Texas

(915) 747-5648
FAX: (915) 747-6471

Dear Mr. Morony:

There have been allegations filed with this office realted to violations of official UTEP rules and regulations as stated in the UTEP Handbook of Operating Procedures of which you might have knowledge. Specifically, it is alleged that you distributed an email to individuals on and off campus that contained false statements about UTEP employees and the statements could harm their reputations, which could be a violation of:

The Handbook of Operating Procedures, (H.O.P.) 1.6(0), distributing, posting or carrying on campus any petition, handbill, sign, poster, or a piece of literature, or instilling, occupying or using on campus any booth or table, if the booth or table is wholly or partly for the distribution or dissemination of words or materials that are obscene, libelous, or that is directed to inciting or producing imminent lawless action and is likely to incite or produce such action.

Section 2-202, Defamation, A. No person shall make,distribute, or display on the campus any statement that unlawfully defames any other person. B. A statement unlawfully defames another person if it is false, if the false portion of he statement injures the reputation of the otehr person, and if the speaker has the constitutionally required state of mind as set forth in decisions of the United States Supreme Court.

As a result of the above, you are required to meet with me to discuss your alleged involvement and to determine whether you should b eheld responsible for violating th epolicies stated above. You must answer this formal summons within 5 business days from the receipt of this letter by calling (915) 747-5648 to schedule an appointment. Failure to set an appointment to meet with me by February 4, 2005, may result in a disciplinary hold being placed on you racademic record, which would preclude you from registering for any classes until you do respond to this summons. [ In my own humble and yet unassuming case, through 12/31/2099, believe it or not! Heh, heh, heh! ] Please avoid this result by following the guidelines as described in this letter.

For your review, enclosed are three(3) brochures that explain The Discipline Process (Appendix A), The Hearing Process ( Appendix B ), and The Appeal Process (Appendix C). You are encouraged to read these brochures as they give you an outline of the discipline proces and your rights during the process. For further information, please refer to the following websites: and .


Christy D. Moran, Ph D.
Assistant Dean of Students


cc: Dean of Students Disciplinary File

Enclosures: (3)

Monday, July 24, 2006

Another Real Life NMSU Mystery!

NMSU's Lt. Col. David Abbott, OIC of the ROTC Program, and Patrick Robinson's Story of the Admiral's Statue that Miraculously Peed for Three Days Straight!


When some of the male UTEP fans both physically assaulted and verbally assaulted one female NMSU ROTC program photographer, and at the same time trash-talking bench-warmers of UTEP Coach Price's Miners made like they were Duke University's lacrosse team running hot in a Duke U. Pack Attack Mode against another NMSU female student press photographer, the big shots on the University of Texas Board of Regents in Austin mistakenly thought they had weathered the storm.

By the end of the first year afterwards they gradually came to realize they had been wrong.

Dead wrong!

Because by July, 2006, there was a brand new joker in the deck.

As our UTEP student newspaper put it, in one of Sports Editor Joe Velarde's articles in the June 21, 2006 issue, "New assistant AD takes wheel: Wickstrom looks to drive Miners to next level."

This was Michegan's Brian Wickstrom, who as he must have put it to Joe Velarde, was "[o]riginally a banker."

Only time would tell!

Chapter One: Erica writes a letter to the editor.

On September 14, 2005, the following Letter to the Editor appeared on page two of the University of Texas at El Paso's student newspaper, "The Prospector."

The newspaper's duty editorial page layout person for that week headlined the letter "Game day manners." The letter itself was a criminal prosecutor's dream in its matter of fact concisenss and had this to say:

"I understand that the rivalry between UTEP and New Mexico State has been going on long before I was born. Such rivalries are supposed to instill school spirit in students, alumni and fans alike. These are the types of games that many wait months for. But on Saturday, Sept. 3, I saw the worst type of human behavior, not from the players on the field but from the UTEP fans and UTEP football players on the sidelines.

"As I was walking up the stairs of the southwest side of Aggie Memorial stadium, I witnessed a large group of UTEP fans throwing bottles, spitting on, physically and verbally threatening men in full military uniform. These young men are members of NMSU's Army ROTC program. They are being trained to become officers in the Army. Once they graduate they will be deployed to serve their country in Iraq. Many already have, and do as members of New Mexico's National Guard.

"What I find ironic is that most of these fans probably own the popular We Support Our Troops car magnets. If these so called patriots did support their troops, why did they attack grown men in full uniform? These young men are no different than soldiers stationed at Ft. Bliss.

"What was also shocking was the behavior of male UTEP fans toward women. I saw several UTEP fans physically push and verbally assault the ROTC program's photographer. This young woman, who stands 5'2" and weighs less than 100 pounds, was almost knocked off her feet by men twice her size. The UTEP football players made disgusting sexual gestures and sexual comments toward a female NMSU photographer, while Coach Mike Price stood within earshot. So this is the pride of El Paso?

"The behavior of UTEP fans was not only uncalled for, but deplorable. Not even at the larger rivalries such as that between Michigan and Ohio State, do fans act in this manner. If everyone brought themselves down to this level we might as well become the soccer hooligans we see so much on Wildest Police Videos. This was the proof that I needed to solidify the fact that I chose the right school."

Proud Aggie

Erica E. Saucedo class of 'o5

What Erica had inadvertently discovered was just the tip of an iceberg. It was a sad, all-too predictable commentary on the consequences of what happens when a formerly all-American University becomes totally out of control, the veritable academic equivalent of an Enron of Texas-style continuing criminal enterprise, as so many of us had come to call it.

Moreover, a continuing criminal enterprise where everything under the sun, and not just sex, spelled s-e-x, was for sale. Big time!

And it had all been going on since even long before June, 2003, when yours truly became heavily involved, as we tell about in the very next chapter.

Stay tuned!

Chapter Two: From Russia for sex: When UTEP's academic crime syndicate went truly international, and made big bucks and FBI history

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Typical Case of an American University Student Complaint Against an American University Faculty Member.

September 13, 2005

From: Dr. Gregory B. Lush, UT El Paso Dept. of Electrical and Computer Engineering.

To: Dr. Mimi Gladstein, UT El Paso Professor of English and Theatre Arts.

Re: Student Complaint Submitted to Student Welfare and Grievance Committee.

Dear Dr. Gladstein,

Mr. Dennis P. Morony has filed a complaint against you with the Student Welfare and Grievance Committee regarding his grade in ENGL 4319 American Fiction Since 1945, taken during the Summer 2004 semester. A copy of his complaint is attached.

In accordance with the procedures which govern the operation of the Committee, you have the right to respond to the complaint in writing, but are not required to do so. A member of the Student Welfare and Grievance Committee will be appointed as conciliator in this case. The conciliator will be in contact with you and Mr. Morony soon to gather more information and to attempt to reconcile the problem.

I am the outgoing chair of this committee so I will not be handling this case any more after this, but you may feel free to contact me if you have any questions.


[Scribbled signature]

Dr. Gregory B. Lush

(915) 747-6632; (915) 747-7871 (FAX); (email: )

Cc: P. Arenaz, Vice Provost; D. Morony (student) [ My own student's copy in Dr. Lush's envelope included whole shebang, too! Dennis ]

[Dennis' Complaint Summary]

Please be sure to specifically state what you want as an outcome of these proceedings.

"What I want as an outcome of these proceedings is poetic in its simplicity: the letter grade of A. I fairly earned it by acing both the midterm exam and the final exam of the indicated course, thus giving me the legitimately earned so-called institutional average of 3.90 for my past 30 credit hours, not a 3.80!"

It is my sincere belief that this grade was based, in whole or in part, on:

Bias: etc.
Arbitrariness: etc.
Caprice: etc.
Impermissible Discrimination: etc.

So on and so forth, signed, dated and etcera!

Morony, Dennis P. 1-800-xyz Additional Pages 1-4

"A summary of this complaint now follows, but first I should like to point out that while Dr. Gladstein's email to me of Tuesday, 3/8/2005 gives her position thusly, The syllabus clearly states how the semester grade will be calculated, I either didn't get a copy of it, or I did -- and then misplaced it. In either case I concede to Dr. Gladstein up front that what she says is so. Nor do I feel it necessary to illustrate Impermissible Discrimination by citing how, when she was a Dean of Liberal Arts, Dr. Gladstein marked Condition A on my Petition for Reinstatement, which I signed on May 14, 2001. She could have allowed me Condition C -- Student must choose Option 2, as Dean Myron Nadel allowed me to do in April of 2003.

"Instead, I'm going to show that Dr. Gladstein's particular use of her pop quizzes -- however described, that she used for one-third of our final grade in English 4319, Prefix 31821, Summer II of 2004 satisfies all the requirements for these elements: Bias, Arbitrariness, Caprice and Impermissible Discrimination -- whether applied individually, or indiscriminately toward the entire class. Further, that the ways and means used in giving these quizzes clearly indicated that their primary purpose was to provide Dr. Gladstein herself an effective means of psychological domination, intimidation and control -- presumably for some desired ideological or political agenda of her own; an agenda, further, that may have entailed the projection of an anti-Hispanic bias, among other things, especially focused upon the female class members.

"To better situate this perception of classroom reality, I believe it only fair to Dr. Gladstein to add this, as well: I personally, belong to that growing group of students, staff and faculty who have long been convinced that the University of Texas at El Paso is, overall, the academic equivalent of an Enron-styple continuing criminal enterprise. Why? Because 95% of [r]egistered students fail to complete a basic degree in four years and 73% when this is extended to six years. Then, too, in the latter case, given the data published recently by the financial aid office, this failure to complete a four-year degree in a six year period adds up to a net financial loss to those 57% who have borrowed an average of $11,900 apiece in student loans of a staggering total of $89,000,000 dollars. This in turn is well within the Enron range, however calculated!

"And, so that we can see the academic culture in which she functions, let us continue with Dr. Gladstein. For the sake of brevity I will now limit this entire case to just one(1) incident as representative of the whole.

"While she ably manifests all the qualities associated with an excellent instructor when so inclined, it is my considered belief, intellectually speaking, that Dr. Mimi Reisel Gladstein lacks the [..] emotional detachment and self-control necessary for the maintenance of even a minimum degree of academic credibility in the classroom when confronted with issues related to the class material that reflects ill on a Marxist-Leninist world view. This is manifested in the abrupt and often contradictory ways she strove to pit student against student when giving the little quizzes, trying desperately to maintain psychological ascendancy, custody and control over the class as a whole using standard Marxist-Leninist techniques. Her irruption into one of her Latina-bashing temper tantrums one morning while we were briefly discussing Helen María Viramontes' short story, Cariboo Café, on Friday, July 23, 2004 is a case in point.

"While one reviewer of this same story, Deborah Owen Moore, (Studies in Short Fiction, 6/22/98 ) albeit while incorrectly naming the country as El Salvador, explains a situation whereby ...a woman in [obviously Nicaragua] has lost her son to the secret police who snatch children suspected of aiding the contras ...., is making a simple comment from within the context of Viramontes' story itself; at least three(3) of us (two women, one man) set off an emotional tirade by Dr. Gladstein by simply echoing similar statements. And this included a related passage referring to an eight or nine-year old, cigarette smoking [presumably Sandinista] 'guard.' That little boy is nothing. He's just a little boy!, dutifully screeches in rage the UTEP [D]epartment Chairperson of Theatre Arts. Nearly all [of] us are taken aback! What's all this, for pity's sake?

"Is she suffering from some borderline personality disorder? The effects of a developing dependency on legally prescribed psycho-active or psycho-tropic drugs masquerading as 'medications,' or what?

"Excuse, me, professor! Aren't we forgetting something here? You proudly tell us that you're an immigrant from somewhere. You're a little reluctant to say where, for all you seem to know German rather well. You proudly tell us that the 4th of July is special to you, too! Yet you begin to make us wonder. By simple process of elimination based on your emotional explosion over the Viramontes story we can quickly narrow it down to a 90% probability that you emigrated from one of three countries: Soviet-occupied Austria (up to the early 1950's), Soviet Czechoslovakia, or East Germany (last two Soviet occupied up to at least 1990). So why all the hysterics? I mean:

"Simon Wiesenthal, NAZI-hunter, talking about Communist East Germany, and the secret police, the Stasi: The Stasi was much, much worse than the [NAZI] Gestapo, if you consider only the oppression of its own people, the Gestapo had 40,000 officials watching a country of 80 million, while the [Communist East German] Stasi employed 102,000 to control only 17 million. As author John O. Koehler comments further in his book, Stassi, when we add the Stassi's informers, or Spitzel, of whom some were as young as twelve years, to the Communist secret police total the ratio became one informer per 6.5 [East German] citizens.

"So, then, what about Viramontes' story, of Nicaraguan children snatched by secret police for aiding the [US-backed} Contras? And of guards barely eight years old? Just why is it necessary that we students here at the UTEP English Department are obliged to put up with borderline verbal abuse such as this, when the East German Communist secret service archives are nowadays an open book, and have been for nearly fifteen years?

"The Nicaraguan Sandinista Secret Police were called the Nicaraguan General Directorate of State Security (DGSE) and they were trained ... oh, no! What's this: Oh, my goodness! By the East German Communist Secret Police, no less! As Koehler dryly points out: In line with [Stasi Colonel-General] Mielke's edict that the Sandinista secret police recruit informers, in-country schools taught the Nicaraguans how to cope with dissidents and Counterrevolutionaries, [Like bad little boys posting pro-Contra propoganda, maybe? Oh, my!] The instructors applied Stassi directives I/79 and II/79 to the letter. [applied within East Germany itself by Stassi]. These secret directives set forth the methods employed in recruting informers in such masses that the hydra of the DGSE would reach into all strata of society.

"And to help the Nicaraguan secret police as they were being trained by their East German Communist comrades, [in Wiesenthal's words] worse than the NAZI Gestapo? Why, the Czechoslovakian and Bulgarian comrades, of course! As Koehler tells us, by May 1980, the Czechs and Bulgarians reported that they had already sent aid to Managua [Nicaragua], including a total of 1,500 sub-machine guns, 50 light machine guns, 12,000 pistols, 8,000 rubber truncheons [emhasis added, as the old-time NAZI Gestapo just loved rubber truncheons, they helped people remember things!], and 18,000 lightweight uniforms and shoes. Ammunition shipments totaled 2,000,000 rounds.

"Still anxious to please, the Bulgarians added that they had also pledged an immediate shipment of two field hospitals and 500 field telephones with ten switch-boards and sixty miles of cable.

"In conclusion, well frankly, I could care personally less what Dr. Gladstein's views are as to exactly why East Germany's plan to help install a post-Hitlerian People's Paradise in Nicaragua went down in flames, as did [E]ast germany itself, along with the Soviet Union, etc. As far as I am concerned, that is all her business.


"When Dr. Gladstein sets out to destroy classroom harmony for some lunatic agenda of her own, and uses a basically perverted system of testing as a means of psychological control and manipulaton backed up by outbursts of borderline verbal abuse, and then says my acing both the essay mid-term and essay final count for so much zip -- well, then! That's another thing altogther! Because every question asked by myself or my classmates to clarify answers given on a little quiz by those with whom we had exchanged papers for grading afterwards set off yet other tirades. More, this abusive pattern on the part of Dr. Gladstein, had, by Friday, July 23, 2004, long been set: Bias, Arbitrariness, Caprice, Impermissible Discrimination. We respectfully submit that they are all here,

"A series of copies of emails, etcetera, follows these four(4) additonal pages. Thank you!"

[ This case was due to drag on through February 2006! ]

Semper fi, all! Dennis Paul Morony

Saturday, July 22, 2006

Titulares de Impacto. Marzo 6 de 1986.



"La Terca Política del Gobierno nos Condena a una Eterna Dependencia"



"Malos Augurios para un Año Electoral"


"¿Cambio de Táctica Priísta a Favor del Ciudadano?"


"Un Nuevo Volcán: La Universidad de Nuevo León"

"Los Nuevos Atilas Destruyen al País"


Friday, July 21, 2006

"An All-Over-the-Map Discussion on Che, Revolution and Marxism in Mexico"

Posted by Dennis Morony on February 19, 1999.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Reader Response II, Detective Fiction, Fall of 2004.

[Coben's basketball thriller, Fade Away; our class assignment was to write an add-on to the ending, having first repeated the last three lines of the book itself, good exercise in creative writing! One, further that anyone can do no matter who she (or he) is, UTEP English & American Lit major, or not. Ernesto was a not. Ernesto waxed yours truly on the final exam, like by some 10 or 12 points. Ernesto was damn good!]

"Are you Burt Wesson?"

The big man nodded. "Can I help you with something?"

Win smiled. "Yes," he said. "I think you can." (Coben -- 346)

"Win!" A piercing feminine shriek coming at the same instant as the sound of squealing tires momentarily froze the scene. Ms. Shari Weinberg, a.k.a. Mrs. Saddam Hussein, (34) tumbled out of a white subcompact and rushed towards him.

For months she had wondered when she might see Win again. She had longed to thank him for the fabulous contract he had won her with the number one studio of Hollywood Moguls Inc. for her English language adaptation of the campy French comedy, Papy Fait de la Résistance.

Win had figured, correctly, that Myron was still involved emotionally with other matters, and so had handled the details himself, making sure Esperanza took charge of the paper work. This guaranteed that everything was kosher, for all Win had scored off Shari's designated agent Martin Felder in the process. But that hadn't bothered Win.

Now here he was! And in Shari's own hometown of Tucson, no less.

The split second's interruption was enough to foil Win's grab at Burt Wesson's gaudy Hawaiian luau shirt. Burt slammed the door in his face and darted toward the back of his house in a blind panic. He shoud surprising speed for such a big man.

For all the memory came from far out of his past, this shrill cry of "Win!" was enough to make Burt Wesson shudder. And for his adrenalin and instinct for self-preservation to kick in on overdrive.

And it was due to that headlong flight in blind fear that Burt Wesson forgot a basic physical reality. One that related directly to his new neighbors on the other side of the ramshackle wooden privacy fence, seven feet tall, that separated the two back yards in this otherwise quiet neighborhood of low-cost bungalows and sour orange trees.

Burt had knocked the fence together after a drunken row with the previous owner, winding up giving his neighbor the smooth side of the fence and himself the other. This meant that whatever nails Burt had managed to drive in straight all faced towards his own place. In the passage of years many had become quite loose.

As luck would have it, new renters ha drecently moved in. For one Ronnie Dimwitz, a.k.a. Camouflage Pants, (202) had annoyed Mr. B. Man once too often, and so B. Man had dispensed with his services and at the same time recommended that Pants move away, like far, far, away.

Pants had thought it owuld be cool to move to Phoenix and move up in society by taking the high road as a "crystal meth cook." Hi sfirst cousin Lonnie Dimwitz had often invited him to come out West and try his hand at "being somebody." It had been some itme, however, since they had last been in contact.

But alas! When Ronnie-the-Pants stepped off the airliner, Cousin Lonnie ha dmet him at the airport curbside pickup zone wearing a tight-lipped expression on his thin and morose face. Without further ado he had driven them both straight to Tucson, meanwhile giving Pants lurid accounts of how things had undergone a violent change.

For one Sam the Man Graviano had begun parlaying his exalted status as a star member of the US Marshal Service's Protected Witness Program in Phoenix into a multimillion dollar crystal meth empire. According to history buff Cousin Lonnie, Sam the Man's business methods were right out of the classical eras of Sicilian mob history in the Rocky Mountian and Southwest regions of America. Those bad old days when bosses like Santos Trafficante and Don Pasquale Calabreze called the shots from Denver to Mexico.

Pants listened, yawned, and concurred. Nowadays, Phoenix would have a hostile business climate for ambitious do it yourselfers.

Hence, Tucson was the place for enteprising freelance "meth cooks" to set up shop. But, first tings first. The cousins needed to invest in the biggest, meanest, ugliest, cross-bred Doberman-Pit Bull combination money could buy. Better yet, why not one with that all-important Tibetan Mastiff Y Chromosome? Now, that would guarantee a body weight of at least one hundred and eighty-five lean pounds of bone and muscle and bone-crunching jaw strength equal to thrity-five hundred pounds to the square inch.

With the aid of a couple of joints now and again, the cousins became truly expansive as they pondered their prospective guardian angel. They decided that they would feed the lucky animal all the raw meat scraps it could hold, but only once every other day. They got the animal and named him "Backyard Monster."

Reason number one for this investment was simple. Sam the Man and his minions might not be content to stay in Phoenix. And reason number two was that some nosy neighbor might take to looking over the fence into their back yard, uninvited, like that big beer drinking loud-mouthed clown living behind them. As it was, it didn't take long for Backyard Monster to take exception to being constantly teased by one Burt Wesson, whether the man was drunk or sober.

Burt liked nothing better than to quietly creep up to a knot hole in the fence, scrabble lightly on the boards to catch the dog's attention, and then jab a stick into his muzzle. Backyard Monster soon caught on and learned to approach just so far and then to bark as he jumped straight up and down, drooling furiously.

Now, reason number three for having Backyard Monster never so mnuch as entered the cousins most stoned imaginations. Namely, that that same beer drinking and loud mouthed neighbor might one day actually lose all connection to reality and try a full scale hom einvasion smashing right through the fence itself. And then, in a fit of bellowing fear and rage, make a clumsy attempt to smack their Backyard Monster right in his hungry mouth, using his own bare and bloody right knee.

Here he came! Burt crashed through the flimsy boards like a three hundred pound human cannon ball, injuring his knee on a jagged nail in the process. He knew that Win was in hot pursuit, running parallel to him along a narrow utility easement, closely followed by Shari.

Perhaps in hi spanic Burt may have tought that he couud gain access to his neighbors' house and beg their help. Perhaps he figured anything was better than falling alive into Win's hands. If the latter was the case, then Burt figured wrong. Tragically, conclusively and terminally wrong.

Making things still worse, however, was the lamentable fact that the famished and neglected animal had actually passed two whole days without so much as a scrap of fresh meat, due to his masters' recent preoccupation with sampling the results of their culinary skills a little too freely.

Thus, due to youthful forgetfulness, they had left their Backyard Monster slavering with hunger indeed!

And so it was that less then ten seconds from Shari Weinberg's shriek of "Win!" the entire neighborhood was shaken by a loud crash, one that sounded like a dump truck suddenly upending a load of kindling wood onto a concrete floor, followed almost immediately by a screaming roar of pain and terminal agony. A sheer blast of sound reminiscent of nothing so much as some prehistoric battle at the beginning of time, between Primordial Man and Primeval Beast, with the Beast triumphant over the Man once again.

Win and Shari stopped abruptly, less than a yard from the wooden fence runing laong the edge of the utility easement that gave them a degree of protection from the sudden death and mayhem in the yard on the other side.

At that precise moment what looked like a shapeless, bloody blob suddenly sailed up into view and fell to the ground right at their feet. The remains of Burt Wesson's neatly severed right kneecap seemed to be telling them something.

Shari could do no more then gasp and lean against Win for support, but Win was still Win. Yet, albeit with a nonchalance that would have done credit to michael Caine in i srole of the suave London hood in "Get Carter," even Win felt obliged to raise a questioning eyebrow of well-bred distaste.

For the message in the evidence before them was plain.

Burt Wesson's foul deed in crippling Myron Bolitar had come full circle.

And the hungry perpetrator would never be prosecuted.

Or at least, not as a human.

Both Shari and Win could still hear Backyard Monster grunting and making a sort of chuckling sound as the victor of this latest primordial encounter happily gnawed away at the sudden largess of fresh, raw meat. Human meat.

* * * * * * ** * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *******

Un saludo cordial: to all you "UTEP English Department Palace Guard" who were there, and who, along with those two professors, whose names, for their continued physical well-being we likewise tactfully omit; thanks to all of you for making this class "The UTEP Class of Fall 2004 that Really Rocked!" Dennis